Humorous Best Man Speech - The Groom’s Life Story :: Wedding Toasts Roasts Speeches

Humorous Best Man Speech - The Groom’s Life Story Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. It’s surprising just how far some people are prepared to travel for a free lunch. It’s a good job the groom didn't choose the menu, otherwise we would have had penut-butter sandwiches washed down with beer. Firstly, I have a feet messages to read out.(read telegrams etc.) As Bill Clinton said to each of his girlfriends, I wont keep you long. I’d like to begin by thanking the groom for asking me to be best man. I would also like to thank the bride for allowing him to ask me. The groom has a splendid set of friends, and to be nominated from such esteemed company is without doubt a great honor. Thanks also to the ushers, friends, and family who have all helped to make this day so special. (To the bride) You make a fine bride and look beautiful and radiant. I couldn't help but notice the groom swell with pride when he saw you walking clown the aisle in that dress. (To the groom) You are indeed a lucky man, you have married someone who is attractive, warm, loving and caring. A wife who will be all you could ever wish for and more. (To the bride) You have married someone who is: handsome, witty, intelligent, charming, good looking... (To the groom) Sorry, I'm having trouble reading your writing. When the groom asked me to be his best man, I consulted the Internet for help. I discovered that the job is essentially comprised of four main tasks: 1. Organize the stag party (bachelor party) - perhaps you could tell us again how you burst the inflatable sheep. 2. Help the groom dress (at last I found out where the G-string from Dublin went.) 3. See that all ex-girlfriends are kept at bay (quite a task as most of them have been released under care in the community.) 4. Make a speech. I thought it was going to be tough following a speech by the groom and I was right, I couldn't understand a single word he said. I did find a lot of other interesting things on the Internet but I wont go into that now. I met the groom over ten years ago, and I often wonder what it would be like if I didn't have him as a friend. Sometimes the smile lasts for days.